Serious thoughts

So today I saw the mentally retarded (not a value judgement, it's a DSM diagnosis) woman riding her very large tricycle down the street. Well, actually, I was at an intersection and she was sitting across from me (going the other way) and holding up traffic. She was apparently waiting for someone who had been walking behind her. My son who was in the car with me needed an explanation as to why we waited at the intersection for so long.

*brief Be A Responsible Driver speech*

But after dropping #2 son off at school I started thinking about how far we've come from the days when we put anyone who was "imperfect" in a home. My mom has a cousin with Down's Syndrome. About 55 years ago when she was born, the doctors told Karen's parents to put her in a home as she was be totally uneducatable. Her parents didn't take that and now Karen lives a life most would not believe possible.

In my state, we have a system where we maintain kids who are at risk of state (mental) hospitalization in their homes. Most of the time this works to a varying degree of success. There are still those kids who need long term hospitalization. But even just twenty years ago, all these kids were shipped off to the nearest state hospital and the average stay was 18 months.

Now I am completely aware that on occasion, society tends to act like a wildly swinging pendulum in a grandfather clock. Going so far one way that we snap back and go too far in the other direction within two generations. For instance, shipping every kid with emotional problems to the mental hospital for 18 months vs. keeping kids who SHOULD be in a hospital or home in their communities. Is there a middle ground? Is there a place where we recognize that in our desire to see everyone as "normal" we're really not helping anyone?

There are kids I work with who will never be "normal." Of course, we could go into a long rant about what is normal! But some of these kids will never be able to live on their own unassisted. They aren't likely to get married. Is there an appropriate time for us to accept some of these things and adjust our expectations accordingly?

Just thinking.